Hey Big Wide World,

Its been a while but i can see that more and more people everyday are looking at my blog and hopefully enjoying the music i post on it.
This post on my blog however is going to be a moan and a place to clear my head on all the stuff that is going through it.

As most people my age are I am in uni now. I am a second year Popular Music student in Cambridge. Yes its stressful, yes its hard, yes the work load keeps piling up but i am enjoying it. However, part of me wonders what i am going to get out of it. Popular music doesn't get you job at the end of it. It doesn't even give you a idea of what you can do and thats worrying me slightly.
I have a twin sister who is training to be a nurse, her life is set out for her. Everyone needs nurses, there is never not going to be nurses in the world. But, to put this post back to music, some people in this world say, music is not a necessity.  In university most of the time i feel like the less able than most people on my course. I feel like i am just there to make up the numbers, that i am not needed by anyone. I guess i should just try and make myself known, show that i can make it in this business so that people actually want me instead of me wanting them too.

Now the one amazing thing about Uni is the people i have met. I have made some best friends for life here. Including the love of my life Gareth. Gareth is one of those rarities in life, he's the boy everyone girl hopes for but he's mine. And saying that is the best feeling in the world. I know most girls say they have found the one and then proceed to tell you about that love that they have found in the soppiest way possible. But i'm going to steer clear of that and just say, Gareth is necessity in my life. He's my definition of love.
A couple of months ago however the bombshell hit, Gareth's going to America for six months. I am so happy for him and i dont think i have been prouder when i found out, not even for my family. But the other side of me is screaming ' what the fuck am i going to do without you'. I get upset at the best of times but without 'my rock' in Cambridge with me. Life is suddenly becoming harder.

The other thing is i'm ill. I don't know why i keep getting so ill but i will find out soon and its safe to say im shit scared. I havent told everyone everything. I am going somethings alone but i guess its easier when its stuff like this.

However, people have worse in life and i am glad that the only place i vent is here. Because my problems will seem a lot smaller compared to some people in this world. Thank you for reading.

TheGirlBetweenTheHeadphones - Laura x